It occurred to me over the weekend that in life we experience much pain.
In fact God alerted me to my own periods of pain. 3 kids, 3 labours, relationship hurts, body sufferings, family dysfunctions, seeing people you love in periods of grief, physical agony and so much more.
All of these times in my life have been intensely personal and times where the pain seemed so big, that nothing else could exist.
We went to Warburton over the weekend and had a day and a half of full rain. Stuck in a tiny caravan with 5 bodies…mess….sitting on a pile of mattresses and pillows endeavouring to “find the joy”, kids getting cabin fever and the lack of motivation to cook anything – meant we were consuming the junkiest of junk food…never helps with the moods of the family.
It was painful to be in that place.
At the first glimmer of sunshine, we headed up the mountain – thinking we’d go on a tree top walk and just take in the beauty of God’s creation. When we got there, the chains were on the gate with padlocks – with a sign that said – “Closed due to expected high winds”. The disappointment began to hit…..and then a spontaneous thought. Lets go 15 minutes more up the mountain and get to the top. We were in! Great Hubby idea!
As we drove up, the intensity of kid arguments and yappiness increased. My head began to spin a little, as the coolness of the weather outside began to permeate the inside of the car. How on earth was I going to cope with the coldness. My blood pressure rarely enjoyed the cold – it often exacerbated symptoms of dizziness and circulation issues.
I closed my eyes, putting the pain to one side – as I whispered to God…..”everyone is so excited, please give us this time together. Take all the physical stuff and let us have a normal family moment please Father. I am trusting you to get me up the hill and allow the family to enjoy this time together.”
Peace came.
When we arrived, the blanket of white snow (in the middle of Spring) that met our eyes…. was incredible. All pain was lingering in the background, but I just chose to enjoy this moment, despite it.
We danced about in the snow. The kids played and threw sneaky snowballs at one another. Everyone came alive. For a time, there was such enjoyment, that I forgot about the temperature and afflictions – I just ran about like a little kid.
Feeling the sensation of crunching snow beneath my slip on shoes. Listening to the sounds of laughter and compacted snow balls hitting backs. Breathing in the freshness of the cool air around me. Living in the moment of family fun and redemption of what had been a challenging weekend away. We had pushed on despite the mood, despite the physical exhaustion, despite it all.
As I looked around me, I saw such beauty. The snow which had collected amidst the branches of such majestically tall trees.
Our daughter commented that it felt just like Canada! (lol…we’ve never been) The fascinating way the snow collected upon itself, as you roll the base of your snowman. What a delight!
After a while, the chill had set in and we all felt it was time to head back down the mountain. For years, I had avoided the snow – the hours of driving & windy roads (every car sick woman’s nightmare), the physical coldness and what it did to my body, the exhaustion after a whole day at the snow.
How many years we had avoided things in order to cater to pain.
Well, God had redeemed it all. A perfect trip.